Friday, April 5, 2013

It's here!

The time has come!

I've been longing for this since December 2012.

For the Doctor to say those magic words:

"Amanda, you are fit to return to work!"

Today I walked out of my Doctors with a little jump in my step and a smile on my face.  I was tickled happy.

So this coming week I begin to physically, mentally and spiritually prepare myself for what is to come.

As this week approaches and as I carry on I must remember that my health is not something to take for granted, nor is my relationship with the Lord.

I needed this time to learn how to say "No"

It's never been one of those words that has come easily to me.  I love to serve, but I also needed to examine why I liked serving.

Was it because I thought I was better and not in need?

I'd like to say the answer to that is "no", but I know my heart.  I am a sinner.  I desire unrealistic perfection.  I desire to serve, serve, serve and need nothing from others, not even God.  I desire self sufficiency.  I am my own idol.

These past few months I have had to learn how to accept help from others.  Not something I am good at.  Its weird transitioning from being able to cook your own meals, to having meals delivered to you in bed or take baths because you don't have the strength to stand up in the shower.

I saw a side of me I did not like at all.  A very short, snappy Amanda came out.  I was in pain and abused that excuse all too often.  I'd snap frequently at those I love and they put up with me.  Lord Bless you's!

To any of you I've hurt, I'm sorry.  God is in some heavy business of working on my heart right now and I pray He continues.

I also pray that with my next trial, that I would face it with joy.  Christ is my only hope for this.  He is the only one who can develop my character here.

I pray that in all I do, may I be a woman who glorifies you oh Lord.  Because when that time comes, it is you I must give an account of everything I do.

To Him be the Glory.  My Rock, My Anchor, My Redeemer.


A Late Night Psalm
Inspired by: Him
Written by: Amanda

It's Just Christ and me.  Here darkness must flee.
There is no room for three.
Only three in one Trinity.
It's just Christ and me.

It's Just Christ and me.  Even though he tempt me.
I look to the cross.
I have been set free!
Oh, the power of Jesus blood on me!
It's just Christ and me.

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