Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Forever His

So I'm currently reading this book by Henri Nouwen called "Reaching Out" and it talks about going from loneliness to solitude and hostility to hospitality.  It's quite a heavy read, but a good one.  It's reminded me how I really need to sit and be with God before asking others for help.  It's shown me that yet again the more I go to him in despair, the more I trust in Him the deeper our relationship will be.

Last night my heart was aching.  I felt so alone.  I didn't want to address the feeling.  So I half heartedly asked God to meet me in my loneliness and then called it a night as I wiped some tears away.

This morning I awoke with heavy heart again and thought "I can't carry on like this, my heart is too heavy." I sat and let the tears fall and let God speak to me as I listened to "This is our God" by Chris Tomlin and "Our God is Greater" also by Chris Tomlin.

In those moments God met me.  I saw these images of a Father holding a child as she cries.  I also saw Christ pulling me out of the pit {aka my blog title, "Redeemed from the pit"} and brushing all the ashes off and crying and rejoicing with me because I belong to Him...F.O.R.E.V.E.R!!! :D

This was such a raw place for me.  I have a REALLY hard time letting my emotions show.  Especially tears.  I for so long have seen them as a sign of weakness.  I also have never really learnt how to deal with pain.  Jesus is slowly teaching me.  It's not a painless journey dealing with pain with Jesus.  It's hard because God gets in those areas you don't want exposed and they make you itch and feel uncomfortable, at the time.  But in the end there is this overwhelming peace of your soul that trumps any pain your heart may feel.  That peace is the peace of Christ.  That peace is knowing that though this world may rip you to pieces, Christ is in the business of putting it back together. 

So trust in the one who doesn't make promises He can't keep, trust in the one who will always be there because we can't rely on others to always pick up the phone and hear our hearts cry, put all your hope and trust in Christ alone.  And He promises to be there.  And don't take it from me, take it from Him:

“Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. {Hebrews 3:5}

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